People You Meet At The Buffet – Part 10
Just in time for Valentine’s Day, the latest observations from the local buffet.
We have seen a number of people who work as obstructions at the buffet. there have even been a couple that function better in groups of two or more. In spite of all of this, there is still some independent function amongst these people. The conversationalists may block the taco bar, but they still function as independent customers. Even the tag team deciders are still individuals, though they work together to irritate everyone near them.
The Lovebirds are different. The Lovebirds are always in pairs, though I supposed that it is theoretically possible to have a threesome of lovebirds (I have never seen it). What sets the lovebirds off from other multi-person classifications is that the lovebirds are two people who function as one. Naturally, that one person it dead set on making sure you’re culinary satisfaction is delayed.
In their mildest form, lovebirds appear to be attached at the hands, often going up to the buffet together hand in hand. How they manage to function without uncoupling tends to be a bit of a show, providing you are not the one behind them as they serve themselves with smiles and twinkles in their eyes. And because there are two of them, the lovebirds also are effective in blocking not only the food they are currently taking servings of, but food items to either side of them.
Lovebirds are especially annoying because there is a lovebird escalation effect. The hand holding is the mildest form. But lovebirds can grow more amorous, walking slowly with their arms around each other. Lovebirds have also been known to steal kisses while at the buffet, as if the Jello mold somehow stirs romantic feelings. In the most extreme cases, lovebirds will somehow be stimulated by the chicken and corn chowder into a full-blown make out session.
In nearly all cases, there is no dealing with lovebirds. They are completely lost in their own little world of pink hearts and fluffy bunnies and totally oblivious to your attempts to excuse yourself as you try to get to the rolls, or whatever they are blocking. The only thing that you can do is just walk away and hope they are gone before you are ready for your second helping.
Posted on February 14, 2012, in At The Buffet, Observation, Opinion, Personal, Pop Culture and tagged at the buffer, Buffet, observation, Opinion, persona, Pop Culture. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.