People You Meet At The Buffet - Part 9

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I’m back from a fact-finding mission.  Okay, it was Sunday dinner at Hometown Buffet with the parents.  But, I got a lot more insights into all the people you will meet at the buffet.

The Supermodel

The Supermodel does not seem like the type of person you would ever see at a buffet outside of Las Vegas.  Truth be known, they are extremely rare.

The Supermodel is pretty much what you would think when you hear that.  They are the extremely attractive people who you stumble across at the buffet.  The supermodel can be either male or female (but since I’m a male, I will focus on the female side of the equation).  The supermodel is an absolute stunner.  She is a vision of physical perfection that does not belong walking on this planet, let alone towards the pot roast.

Supermodels of either sex are extremely rare.  Some have equated their appearance at a buffet on par with the birth of a white buffalo.  I sighting on an actual supermodel at a buffet is considered the fourth sign of the apocalypse, so I would suggest repenting if you see one.

The “Supermodel”

The “supermodel” is nowhere near as rare as a supermodel sighting, and is always shown with the quotation marks to cut down of the confusion with their rare cousins.  The “supermodel” dresses like you would think a supermodel should dress, though it is very much apparent that they should not be.  ”Supermodels” are almost always big big eaters, though they dressed in outfits that only a little little eater should be wearing.  The typical “supermodel” looks like:

• The man dressed like John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever, though he looks like he at one point ate John Travolta.
• The woman in spandex that is being tested to its limits of tensile strength
• The man who is showing more hair peeking out of his shirt collar than on his head
• The woman with the shirt that says “Sexy Thang”

It is unknown whether the “supermodel” actually think they look good in these outfits, or if they are just emulating their more popular cousins, though, honestly, most supermodels only would wear clothes like this on a runway or a beach during a photo shoot and never actually wear these things in public.